No, I don't wanna

(Beware of what you're about to read. It's very selfish. It's only about ME.)
I just read something. I don't want anything to do with you anymore. I wish I never knew you. I suddenly feel like I just kinda..popped. I don't wanna think of you. My life, my thoughts, my feelings, give it all back to me. I'm hurt, once more. I don't wanna believe it. I wanna know that I'm just thinking a little too much. I know that by tomorrow, my decision will change. But for now, no, I don't wanna. I never thought that this would rip my wounds open again.

"No! Don't do it. It's not worth it. It won't work." I heard it many times already. When will it stop coming back into my brain? I don't wanna hear that anymore. I just want to see change. The change that will never happen.